wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
