i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
