I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
