I heard we made out
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
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