I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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