whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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