Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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