mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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