i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize