Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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