there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Semen is not good for contacts.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
