i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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