East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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