fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
