I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
