1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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