oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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