he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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