thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
