found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
