oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
