Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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