Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
