she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
tell me about the eggs
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
