I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
