I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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