Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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