AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
