Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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