were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
