The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
