i just wanna soil my oats bro
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize