Small penises have feelings too.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
