My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
