he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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