Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
