He kissed a someone with a penis
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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