I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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