I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize