I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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