I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
