you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
