did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
He has the fingertips of a God
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
