I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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