omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
