I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
