So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
