It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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