It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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