A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
